Away From The Numbers

VIEW FROM THE BAY #3 :   MAY 21ST 2007

- by GoF

Bayview ParkPower Station ViewThe Enigma That Is The UndisputedSeason Tickets Not ValidThe Sun Sets On The Power StationBayview Stadium

The Undisputed is away on "assignment" for a few days so the next episode of View is being undertaken by your esteemed Webmaster.

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It’s that time of the year again on the telly. Lots of excitement and build up, the stupid hats, the balloons, the controversies, the highs, the lows, a never ending stream of songs and grown naked fat men with their tops off sobbing uncontrollably into their hands. Still well done to Serbia on their win last weekend.

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Love them or loathe them it looks like the Scottish playoff finals are here to stay and for the fans of the teams in them it gives excitement and trepidation in equal measures. It has been suggested that they would be much better being one-legged affairs at a neutral venue. Not that that provides much consolation for us desolate East Fife fans. In fact, it would be even more embarrassing to lose to a team of one legged spiders.

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When we introduced this column to the website, it was noted that this kind of satirical commentary was very popular in Victorian times. The times of Dickens. Closer examination reveals a number of similarities between the works of the great author and the going ons at East Fife and the lower leagues. "Great Expectations" – a diary of a season of hope and despair for Fife fans. "Hard Times" – the Derrick years. "Bleak House” – a poignant story of a Cowden Family. And a "Tale of Two Shitties" – the chronicles of football in Kirkcaldy and Dunfermline.

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Still keeping with the Dickensian theme, a number of his characters had downright silly names – Martin Chuzzlewit, Sergt Buzfuz and Mr and Mrs Fezziwig for starters. Lots of names with z’s in them there. You don’t get that too much in football, especially not Bayview way. Although after this season’s exciting tactical displays we do have Dave ‘zzzzzz’ Baikie.