Every team has them, or at least used to have them. Journalists call them "characters" or "personalities". They don't even have to be good: most range from the mediocre to the downright awful, but even their awfulness has a certain quality!
Harry joined East Fife in 1974 from Hearts. Officially six foot three in his stockinged soles, everyone knew he was much bigger. The man stood a full head and shoulders above any team mate and seemed twice as big as Bertie Miller.
Oh, what a signing! With McPhee and Miller floating in inch-perfect crosses, East Fife would indeed be playing European football as Pat Quinn had predicted before the season started.
When we saw him play however, there was something unusual about him.
He was unable to jump for the ball, or if he did, by some obscure law of gravity, he appeared to get smaller.
Dreams of Bayview being packed to capacity to see the Mighty Men of Methil take on Juventus, Ajax or Leeds United were cruelly shattered. Instead reality reared it's boring head, relegation followed and League re-organisation virtually banished us from the top division.
Big Harry, or "The Giraffe" as he was dubbed by some visiting supporters, ploughed an often lonely furrow up front for several seasons. He was never a prolific goalscorer, but his fruitful efforts often had a touch of cabaret about them.
In the closing stages of a game of outstanding mediocrity, with the score 0-0, a low cross found Kinnear ambling in at the far post. The crowd collectively held it's breath as Harry swiped at the ball with his right foot, failed to connect, stumbled and as he fell, his left foot sent the ball trundling past the confused 'keeper. Pure genius!
Falkirk must have been equally impressed. Three years later, in a transfer of unprecedented satire, they signed Harry Kinnear. The laughter around Bayview subsided rapidly however. It was a swap deal for Ken Mackie.
Harry Kinnear definitely qualifies, he was always going to. Even his name promised greatness - Harry. You don't get footballers called Harry very often these days. They're all called Ally or Charlie or, as is more likely to be the case, Juan or Thierry.
My personal favourite occurred against Falkirk at Bayview.
by ANGUSFIFER